The salesman is using sex to sell me a CD player, giving me pressure about my love life. 'Mr. Mercurio, it's a five CD player carousel model. You load all five of your CDs into this baby -- you're with your woman, you're gonna make love -- you press "Play," you can go all night.' And I'm like, 'You know, Mr. Salesman, I'm not really a five CD man. You got something that plays 45s? Give me two minutes -- I'll give you the world.'
-- You haven't played solitaire with a real deck of cards in years.-- You have a list of 20 phone numbers to reach five people.-- You chat several times a day with a Nigerian prince over e-mail, but you couldn't name your neighbor.-- When paying a cashier, you only know how to respond to "credit or debit" -- what the hell is "cash"?-- You think "music in the air" refers to free downloads.-- You lose touch with any family member who doesn't have an email address.-- Second-day delivery takes way too long.-- You need PowerPoint to explain what you do for a living.- A "half day" means leaving at 5 p.m.-- You find jokes on computers, not in books or word of mouth.
Yo' Mama is so stupid, she calls beepers collect.
Yo' Mama is so dumb, she stuck the phone up her butt and thought she was makin' a booty call.
Yo' Mama is so stupid, she taped toilet paper to her TV set for free paper view.